Photo of the day: 8

THE SPIDER HATH RETURNED

And I hath removed it from thy chamber and moved it to the garden of thy neighbours.

Teeheehee

Spiders

I'm not scared of spiders. I don't mind spiders at all, in themselves, when observed as a small, stationary insect or on the TV. The reason I don't entirely like them though, is because they move quickly, very quickly. More quickly than I can jump onto the nearest object not attached to the floor, because spiders obviously cannot ascend verticle sofa arms or furniture legs.
Which is an issue because I don't speak spider and so I can't tell it not to run up my trouser legs or into my ear or up my nose or down my shirt.

My most recent spider encounter has inspired me to share some spidery stories with you....

Today:

It had a bigger body than any I've ever seen in England. I thought it was dead so I folded up a bit of loo roll and got into "pinching position" but, just to be sure, I blew at the spider. Lo and behold IT WAS ALIVE! I reeled backwards, screeching as it scrabbled at the wall (the image above is an accurate reconstructed photograph of my behaviour at this moment).

The spider has now disappeared.


Tioman:
I was fixing a broken toilet with another girl. We were being tough and manly and sucking it up when what should run across the tops of our feet? A puppy! Just kidding. A tropical, brown HANDSPAN-IN-DIAMETER-SIZED SPIDER - causing screaming, hopping and flapping hands on all parts, even from those not in the room *cough-Mia-cough-Bethany-cough* - which proceeded to hide behind our mirror and then in our ceiling. I didn't need to sleep that night anyway...

Although imagine what would have happened if the toilet was working...

Malaysian cockroaches:
We had just moved in. We were unsuspecting, innocent exchange students excitedly unpacking our stuff when all of a sudden TWO cockroaches scuttled across the floor in front of us! Cue three screaming, flying girls, leaping for the safety of the bed against the wall on the far side of the room.
Luckily though that was in Mia's room so I actually slept very well that night.

I was filming this so, for your entertainment, here is what I looked like when we found the second one:

Madagascar tent:
There were holes in my mosquito net.
I was so thoroughly nestled into my sleeping bag that only my eyes were exposed. The insects, spiders and godknowswhats marching one by one over the mesh, searching for the weaknesses in my white safety net, and, one by one, they were finding them.
It was like that scene at the end of I, Robot where all the evil robots are crawling through the hole in the ceiling.
Except that those bastards didn't account for me and my sewing kit.

SUCK ON THAT INSECT BITCHES! NO MALARIA FOR ME!!!!

Photo of the day 7

I decided to back up my photos today. 

a thought

I was in bed last night waiting to fall asleep when all of a sudden quite a scuffle started in the street outside. I listened for a moment to all the grunts and shuffling around when I realised that I couldn't hear the dogs barking.

What was going on?

Then I remembered that I wasn't in Nottingham Malaysia listening to a standard issue dog fight but I was in Nottingham UK which probably meant that it was people out there having a people fight in the street.

Weird.

And then I went to sleep.

Yummy in my feet

One of the best things about being home is the winning combination of:

1. Snow
2. Bed
3. Radiator

What I miss about Malaysia...

1) My hair drying on the way to class

2) Getting a massage whenever we went shopping

3) Tioman Island

4) The 7/11 door jingle
As if they chose Big Ben's chimes to try to fool us into thinking it is like the UK campuses...

5) Purposefully provoking people

6) The "WTF" moments
A stall promoting Adult diapers in the Student Association,  locking the fire escapes so the dogs can't get into buildings, water fountains dispensing boiling hot water, the "Green Team" encouraging people to dispose of their old water bottles in exchange for an electrical item or a new bottle, a herd of men with weed-wackers mowing the lawn instead of a single lawn mower and finally, but definitely not least, Malaysia-time are but a few examples

7) The naan bread
Yeah that was pretty good

8) The weekly ordering adventure at KFC
Succeeded twice in 3 months.

9) Being close to such cool places

10) The stuff I never got to do
-Meet Pippin's puppies
-The Philippines
-Find out what Secret Recipe really put in their food
-Go to the top of the Patronus Towers
-Singapore
-Climb Broga Hill and watch the sun rise
-Get henna
-Orangutans in Borneo
-Buy the sandals that I forgot to pack
-Drink out of a coconut
-Become an asian karaoke supersensation with my band of fellow Whities touring asian uinversities and blowing them all away with our amazing karaoke powers, dance routines and pasty white glow

Photo of the day: 6

I've got another masterpiece of a blog planned so, while I'm working on that (and on my January Exams!) I'll leave you with this photo of a public toilet WITH LOO ROLL.